We have not been feeling well in the MacDonald house this week. Myles was diagnosed Tuesday with an ear infection and sinus infection after the daycare sent him home that morning with a high fever. I am also battling overall lethargy, congestion, a mild sore throat and off-and-on headaches. Yuck!
Myles has been home with "Gramma Mac" for two days after I took most of the day off Tuesday to be with him. It was my last available sick day of the year. He is having such a wonderful time with her and I can already feel that it will be tough for him to return to daycare tomorrow.
I'm coming to grips with the fact that he just doesn't like it there. The daycare is rated well and came with good recommendations. But it's a daycare - not a nanny - which he became accustomed to during his first 2+ years. With 18 kids and 3 teachers in the classroom, they just don't have the ability to offer him the attention he so craves.
Complicating things is that Billy and I made a big mistake when Myles was younger. We put him with too many different caregivers. He had Meredith for 3 months as a newborn but she had to return to college. Zina kept him for about 8 months and decided one day she was too stressed to continue keeping him. I was then given clearance to transition to a part-time position and we hired Katy to keep him two days a week while I worked. Two months later, I was laid off and he was home with me.
I returned to work six months later and he began his time with Jade. During this time, we also sent him to a two-day-per-week Mother's Morning Out program so that he could interact with more children. Eight months later, Jade had her second baby (she found out she was pregnant very shortly after starting with Myles).
On May 19, Myles started daycare. With the frequent changing of caregivers - which was never our plan for him - we decided he had to move somewhere stable, where he could remain until starting kindergarten.
Due to the many changes he's already endured, we are unwilling to switch daycare centers. None of our previous nannies are available. So either it works out there or I return to the home...something I don't want to do. I know he's unhappy at the daycare because he is hitting and pushing other children daily...something he doesn't do anywhere else. I've confirmed with his Sunday School teacher and observed him at birthday parties and with cousins...the aggression is definitely limited to the daycare.
So we're trying to decide if he needs to stick it out and learn to thrive without the attention he's seeking (which he'll have to do in school anyway) or if we are making a critical error sending him somewhere that he isn't happy. I know that the teachers (at least 2 of the 3) care about him and want him to succeed there. They seem engaged and willing to help him solve his social issues with the other kids. I know that as far as daycares are concerned, it's a good one. I also hear that the 3/4 year-old class is the center's best.
For now, we're planning to hold on until he moves into that class in March, after he turns 3. If things don't improve, I will have a difficult decision on my hands.
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2 comments:
First, don't feel so hard on yourself for switching sitters. Life just happens that way. I think it's GOOD that happeend in a way--children need to get used to "life changes". Unfortunately many things are NOT stable in our world today. and, Second, keep praying and give it time.
May times, children show aggression when they are board.. maybe they could move Myles to a different class that challenges him more. That's what happened to Gavin.. he was in the transition room (for the late birthdays; not quite 3's) and he was hitting and shoving... they moved him to the 3's and he was 100% different... he's the youngest int he class by 6 months, but he's watching the "older kids" and learning from them.
You're a fabulous mother!!
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