Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Reasons I work

Sometimes people ask me why I choose to work when I have such a wonderful little boy who I could spend my days with. It's a fair question! After all, Myles is truly a joy and there are many days when I have a lot of guilt for leaving him with someone who certainly doesn't love him anywhere near the way I do. So I ponder the question...and offer some answers.

1. I really enjoy having a life outside of motherhood. I tried being home for about six months and didn't enjoy it at all. Now, in all fairness, Myles was at his most challenging while I was home and I felt very unprepared to deal with the challenges. I also felt very tired and found myself dying to get some time away from Myles, which is very unhealthy.

As a working mom, my life is much more routine (most days!). Myles and I spend some time together in the morning, we enjoy our car ride to the daycare center, I come to work on projects that generally don't require mommy skills, and I'm able to socialize with other adults. When 5:00 rolls around, I'm dashing out the door...dying to see Myles and create some memories.

2. I have no support network. With my closest family member living 50 minutes away (and she is very busy with 3 kids!), I typically cannot lean on family to just "give me a break." Usually, I can only get help in an extreme emergency. It's a little better during the summer when my mom is not working, but she, too, is 90 minutes away, hardly around the corner. I also have very, very few friends. The friends I've made in the past 10 years are all either in another state now, or they do not have kids. There are one or two exceptions but again, people are very busy and I can hardly fill much time with just one or two other moms to hang out with.

3. I enjoy having the extra money. It is always interpreted as a selfish statement, but I have to be honest here. I can't stand being "broke." I want to take a vacation every year (although that hasn't quite worked out yet) and I don't want to have to worry so much when we have to spend $5,000 to have our house re-plumbed (which we may be facing right now) or when a car needs major service. Particularly in these economic times, Billy and I are seeing our "net worth" dropping steadily before our eyes...as our house has lost $50k in value in under three years and our investments have been losing money every quarter. In essence, if we were faced with an emergency, we wouldn't have a lot of money to fall back on if I stopped working and we were once again living paycheck-to-paycheck.

So there you have it. Straight from a working mom's mouth. I absolutely adore Myles...I would give up my life if it would save his. My heart does ache for him when I'm gone. But I've been on the other side...and this is the right one for me at this point in my life.

4 comments:

Yellow Beads said...

All three great reasons Jenna! I especially "hear you" with #2! I'm jealous (literally) of my friends who have parents in town and they can just "drop off" the kids when needed.

Yellow Beads said...

Hey, me again--Time for another game of tag!! See my blog for the game :))

Debby said...

All great reasons......
I think you never should feel like you have to "justify" such personal decisions. They are just that...your own decisions. People who love you, should respect you enough to support all of the decisions you make.
At least, I hope they would!!

Debby

kbmama said...

Just found your blog...somehow. Anyway I am a working mom too. Until last year I worked year round. This past year I got a job in the school system and had my first summer off! I was terrified. What would it be like? I can relate to all of your reasons why you work!
Anyway, I'm glad I found your blog and look forward to reading it.